A couple months ago in Fountain Hills, I spoke to a woman who said she knew of an artist who had done a painting kinda-sorta like my refractured watercolors, in particular like ‘The Greening’. She couldn’t remember the artist’s name and apparently he had only ever done one painting like that, but she thought that it was a much older man who lived in Santa Barbara, CA and promised to email his name to me when she returned to her home in the Midwest in May. I have not yet had that email, but I will tell you of her story.
Once upon a time, she bought a condo, and after a while decided she needed artwork. A friend suggested she go to the local framing store, as he also sold art, so she did. On walking in, there it was, hanging at the back of the store, The Painting To Surpass All Paintings. She Must Have It. She asked the store owner to pack it and tell her how much the check should be for, because She Must Have It and money was no object. No, he replied, it’s not mine to sell, it is only here for framing. Then, she said, I don’t care how unethical this seems, but you must give me the owner’s phone number and I will make him a better offer. The store owner sighed. It’s pointless, I know, He Will Not Be Parted From It.
Months later, she was in a hardware store. She said while she was telling me the story that she could not think why she would possibly have been in a hardware store, but she was and she met another customer and they fell to talking and he could think of no earthly idea why he was in the hardware store either, but they talked and they got along well and eventually he asked her for a date.
They went on a date and got along very, very well and another date and another date and some weeks later he invited her to his home. To her astonishment, there it was on the wall, The Painting To Surpass All Paintings and She-Who-Must-Have-It had unknowingly been dating He-Who-Will-Not-Be-Parted-From-It.
There was only one solution. They must marry. So they did. And the three of them lived happily ever after.
However, She-Who-Must-Know-Who-Painted-It is still waiting….